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I cannot write a personal statement that does not make me sound like a pompous git. I'm almost sure that it is impossible. It's also difficult to write a personal statement that doesn't sound like I'm lying through my teeth. Regardless of my random lurve of linguistics and languages writing it all out makes me sound Mary Sue-ish. I supposed I need it to make up for my utter lack of teaching experience but, but oy! I know I can fake personable fairly well (if I have too, I guess) and that I can come across with a good strong voice, that I'm able to write well when I'm not doing the unedited stream of consciousness bit that I write here but I'm still really nervous about it. I suppose I'll tweak it a bit more, give up, print the thing out and send it off. The worst that

Gah, I really hate it when my superiority and inferiority complexes collide like this. Neither one wins, I end up an emo little wreck, and apathy/procrastination generally take over until the looming deadline(s) make me do something. At this point both my complexes are happy because my inferiority complex can tell me what a horrible person I am for putting stuff off and my superiority complex is busy in delighting in the fact that even though I wrote my umpty billion and one page research paper in three hours the day it was due I'm still going to get an 'A' on it.
ladyluckless: (Default)
I hate shoveling snow. I hate shoveling snow in an epic fashion. And whoever came up with the idea to have the driveways in this neighborhood slant at a 50 degree angle should be killed but only after he or she shovels them all.

I hurt. I need to go find someone willing to reassemble my back and shoulders. Preferably someone capable of reassembling my back and shoulders. Ow, ow, owie ow.
ladyluckless: (Default)
I've been having a bout of insomnia lately. I can not seem to force myself to go to bed before 4am even if I have to be awake early. I have no idea why. Cross between can't-sleep-future-will-eat-me and being too tired to sleep.

It turns out that when I'm really bored at 4:00 in the morning and can not make myself go to sleep I break out my hair straightener and fiddle around with it. About halfway through I started to remember why I almost never go through the trouble of making my hair lie flat. It takes forever. And it's not worth the hour and a half of effort to have gasp!easily manged hair when it's going to go back to the way it was as soon as it gets wet. I also learned that I need to cut my hair as the last time I went and did it I'd made it all uneven and that I have no idea where the devil I put my scissors. On the upside it looks kinda nice.

The caffeine I've been feeding myself to keep from crashing when I have no choice but to be awake is starting to make me twitch. Literally. So I think I'm going to have to stop drinking Dew to keep from collapsing during daylight hours before I cause myself some serious harm or get addicted to caffeine again.

I also managed to go an leave my food at home and since it is Superbowl bloody Sunday and we're supposed to get 8-12" of snow I don't think I can get someone to bring me food. I'm busy contemplating what food would be best to turn my $2.30 of change the vending machine will accept (why do I not have anything smaller than a 20 in my wallet?) into now that we have vending machines that sell actual food substitute instead of chips and chocolate.

I hope that the internet provides me with tonight's episode of House quickly so that I don't have to go kill something.
ladyluckless: (Default)
Oy. I've been back at my parent's house for . . . two whole days and I must say I miss Flag. Not because the family I have in Flag is any less insane than the family I have here but because I get the opportunity to leave the house without playing 20 quadrillion questions or being told that I have no reason to leave, or being dragged to do errands. It's nice to be able to escape and remember that there are, in fact, people who don't think I fail at absolutely freaking everything.

I present to you a list of things that I am doing wrong and should avoid doing in the future also known as the things my mother felt the need to lecture me about in the past 48 hours:

*Not fixing my mother's computer
*Fixing my mother's computer
*Not telling my mother what was wrong with her computer
*Telling my mother what was wrong with her computer
*Trying to leave the house to get food because my parent's didn't think people would need to eat until my sister gets here
*Cooking dinner
*Not cooking dinner
*Wrapping presents
*Not wrapping presents
*Working on grad school applications
*Answering the phone
*Not answering the phone
*Answering the phone
*Talking to the neighbors
*Correctly remembering how old I am
*Not having started to clean the dishes/kitchen/bathroom as soon as my mother mentioned it needed to be done because I was busy making food
*Cleaning the dishes/kitchen/bathroom because it needs to be done before my lovely sister gets here, though after I had made and finished eating lunch
*Staying up late
*Playing around with, and generally setting up my shiny new bribe erm laptop computer
*Not spending enough time setting up and tweaking my laptop computer
*And many others

Soon my sister and her infant son will be here to divert some attention from me. Since Amy really loves being the center of attention I might be able to leave the house for a few hours and go read in the park tomorrow. It will keep me from committing some quality matricide.

I miss Tribe.
ladyluckless: (Default)
Okay internet, you win. I give up. Despite the fact that the sources I want supposedly exist--and I've even typed in a few of them by exact title and author--none of the really good ones seems to want to appear in the database. So, I give up. I'm even going to stop trying to understand why on earth a search for materials on the censorship of Tess of the d'Urbervilles brings up a ton of material on Harry Potter. Regardless of what I'm typing in. This should not be happening when 1)I know the name of the article/book I'm looking for 2)I know the name of the author(s) 3) I know the year the thing was published 4) I'm filling out the search correctly. I've decided I'm just going to have to find time to march over to Cline tomorrow and get the stuff in dead tree format. Grr. So much for getting stuff done this weekend.

Headdesk

Nov. 20th, 2007 07:59 am
ladyluckless: (Default)
Dear people who frequent the computer lab-

Please for the love of whatever it is you hold dear clean up after yourselves. I don't mind cleaning up the odd bit of paper, left disks and soda bottles. I really don't. That being said, under no circumstances should I have to clean up your lube (mmm strawberry flavored), your used snot rags, what looked to be the leftovers from the time you ordered half the menu at Chilies or anything that contains your bodily fluids. People like you are the reason I'm afraid to go clean the study cubicles. I peer into the door and wonder just what the dregs of humanity have left for me. I feel like I need to scrub up to the elbow just thinking about cleaning the lab. Seriously, ew.

Also, if you're going to move around various bits of furniture please put them back where you found them. I honestly hope you had a reason you went and rearranged the fishbowl so that the tables formed a giant maze and that that reason had nothing to with wanting to fuck with the lab staff. Same to the guy that went and removed all of the lights from the study cubicles and then arranged them in a pyramid. I could go on about how much I wish the chairs would stop migrating half-way across the lab whenever you come in a group or lot of you would start pushing in your chairs but I know that is too much to ask. But please, please stop acting like it's a huge inconvenience to you if I start rearranging chairs in your area. I'm not going to ask you to take your stuff off the seat or even to stop using the chairs as footstools. I will be removing the rest of your chair fort because other people need to sit, too.

Do not tell me that things used to be different 2-3 years ago thinking that I will be forced to accommodate your insane requests. Printing has never been free, color printing has never cost the same amount as black and white and we have never stocked specialty paper. We also don’t print on anything but regular copy paper but that’s another story. Telling me otherwise is not going to change it. Believe it or not I’ve been working here for over four years. I know lab policy better than you and probably better than 80% of the people that work here, don’t argue with me, it’ll just get you kicked out.

And to one particular person--our cork board is only for official University announcements. There are boards for student messages on campus, ours is not one of them. There was even a sign explaining that, how anyone who wanted permission to put stuff up had to ask the desk staff to approve items and how we would be removing all non-approved items before you taped your sign advertising your availability to teach French to it. Just because you destroyed out sign telling you why your stuff will be removed does not mean you've cleverly gotten rid of the policy. So don't keep replacing your sign with a larger note to "not remove it." It doesn't belong there and I'm going to continue to take it down.

Do not touch me. Just because I am walking about the lab pushing in chairs and there is not a giant desk between us does not mean that it is okay to come up to me and start petting my hair. I know my hair is long, shiny, does that crinkly thing and is oh-so-soft. (I've even managed to get it to stop trying to eat itself, attack small children and magically tie itself in knots. Go, go gadget hair lubricant!) Even if I didn't it would still not be appropriate for you to come up and touch me. I don't like it when people I know start touching me, what makes you think I want you to do so?

Four, yes, four people came up to me today and started petting my hair. Am I wearing a giant sign or something? Is it national invade personal space day? One of them, I had helped before and I figured she was a pretty sweet, mostly technologically inept lady. This was before she flagged me down to tell me I was pretty, started touching me and stroking my hair, and followed me to the door asking questions about my ethnic background. Yeah, lady, you're fucking creepy.

Don't do this. Please.
ladyluckless: (Default)
She's leaving two days early! My mother might even be driving out of town as I type this! Her reasoning behind leaving early may be batshit crazy, but who am I to argue with results? ::does happy dance::

Now maybe I can do the crap that needs to be done around the house without a bitchy, rude, egotistical woman following me about telling me all of my failings and that I need to call her more often. Because, really, I don't have enough misery in my life.

I've been working on my application to McGill. There's so much I feel like I should be doing right this very second and it's driving me nuts. Gah! I also need to figure out some back-up schools in case they decided to do the unlikely but feared "Bwa ha ha ha. NO!" thing to me. These schools need to be far, far away from here. After all I'm looking forward to saying, "I'm sorry Amy, but I can't be your live-in slave/baby sitter I'm going to be somewhere far, far away. This means you'll have to pay someone." It still requires research. And since my mother has been up here lecturing me on all my "failings" my inner inferiority complex that says I shouldn't waste my time doing all this when I'm going to fail epically is reasserting its dominance. I also have essays and crazy professor issues to deal with. Not to mention taking care of all the rat stuff piled in my room and avoiding my family. And getting all the stuff together to move out of the house, back to campus. Yeah, this weekend finally made me realize than any benefits from living there are completely not worth it (Yes, it did take me long enough, silence). So Erin, if you still want me as a suitemate keep room C open. I'll start packing.

Also, I was thinking of switching my mood theme to one of the Phoenix Wright ones floating about. Does anyone know how to go about ganking those things? The people who have posts like "I created a mood theme and you can have it, too" haven't really explained how to do it. And I'm selectively moronic at computer things. The cats are getting a little boring, the sprites in the game are hilariously adorable and I'm looking for an excuse to post something with Godot doing a spit take.
ladyluckless: (Default)
It occurred to me this morning that it has been a long time since I posted and that I really should do something about that. Rather than type up a really long entry with details and many attempts to be witty I'm going to bring you a life update in Siskle and Ebert vision.

Mason jars full of salad dressing carefully hidden in tortillas and gravity at six thirty in the morning? Combined with Murphy's Law applying to everything I do?

. . . . .thumbs down.

A pregnant lady, a limping woman and a man with nothing obviously wrong with him walk into a hospital and wait a really long time to find out that Mike has migraines. I also misplaced my keys.

. . . . .thumbs down.

My family decides that we need to bond. They decide that the best way to go about doing this is to pick the lock on my door. Mom calls to complain that I never call her, how great Amy is and how I really suck at everything.

. . . . .thumbs way down and fist shaking.

Jim sends me an e-mail trying to guess what I dropped on my foot. He went with giraffe.

. . . . .thumbs up.

I have two tests. One is an essay test that asked me to discuss how fairy tales and folklore have been updated for both cultures and time periods. Rather than just go with the examples put forth in class I draw from my body of knowledge on the subject. I include citations. It was an in class exam.

. . . . .thumbs up.

I discovered Square-Enix is selling another round of potions. This time to promote Final Fantasy VII. They are made of metal and glass with the Shinra company logo stamped on them.

. . . . .fangirl thumbs up.

Get Nifty came in the mail.

. . . . .thumbs up.

I have no one to con in to playing Get Nifty with me.

. . . . .thumbs down.

My family has Let It Be Known that we are going to spend Quality time together this weekend.

. . . . .thumbs down.

I have homework and the ability to remove the screen door on my window.

Praise be to the Great Flying Spaghetti Monster. erm . . thumbs up!
ladyluckless: (Default)
Why is it that my vitamins only try to kill me when people are watching? Perhaps the previous sentence needs some background for a few people. I decided to start taking multivitamins in an attempt to be marginally healthier, considering my diet of thing-from-a-box and frozen meals (okay, it's more varied then that, I do buy fresh fruit, I'm not in danger of scurvy yet) left much to be desired in the nutrient department.

I'd been taking these things for awhile until one evening, while Erin was in the room, I attempted to down one of the pills. It didn't go down. I coughed, hacked, spluttered, and it reappeared, mocking me. Erin mocked me too.

"Your vitamins are trying to kill you," she insisted.

"But they've never done that before," I argued, using what is perhaps the worst counter argument known to man.

We've been joking about the incident over the course of the summer, she insisting that the vitamins are waiting until the perfect moment for their tiny nutrient-filled revolt, and I claiming it was a fluke. Time seems to have proved her right. This morning, while once again attempting to add a little nutrition into my life, my nefarious vitamins decided to strike again. Cough, hack, splutter, and mocking laughter--it's like my life is stuck in some sort of evil time vortex where things repeat again and again*. Only this time there were two witnesses.

So, my vitamins are trying to kill me, but only when I have an audience. I swear if my life was a sitcom the only real differences would be less witty dialogue** and more people laughing at me.

* Pretend I did the obligatory time vortex repetition joke. I know I could have copied pasted that line several more times to comply with internet writing standards***.

**LJ doesn't like the British spelling of 'dialogue' and wants me to change it too 'dialog' which annoys me, because I prefer the British spelling. I managed to convince Word that it was a good idea to comply with my wishes on this, how to I make LJ bend to my will?

***A pox on those standards. I will continue to use punctuation, and spell check and not substitute the number ‘2’ for the words to, or too.

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